In East Lawrence, there’s this bus stop bench that locals have decorated and christened ‘the wishing bench.’
I’m not superstitious, and I don’t put a lot of stock in wishes. They’re great for Disney movies (“a dream is a wish your heart makes” and all).
But I’m more into goals.
There’s a fine line between wishes and goals. Wishes are the domain of the universe, goals are something you have to work toward if you want to achieve.
But what can sitting on a bench decorated with yarn and video game controllers and old Christmas trees hurt?
So here are my wishes and their corresponding goals.
My mom’s health.
My mom is doing okay, even after losing her eye to cancer. If anything, I worry more about her mental state after years of surgeries and chemo than I do about the chance the cancer might come back. She’s had a challenging life full of bad luck, and I just want her to be happy. While her health isn’t something I can control, my relationship with her is. So my goal is to visit her at least once a week and spend quality time with her, and not judge her for the decisions she makes about how she wants to spend the time she has.
To publish a novel.
I’ve got ideas. I know good literature. I understand the architecture of good stories. I’m working on my confidence (just typing this as a wish, and making it public, is a big step). Of course, there’s so much luck involved in the whole process—finding the right agent, the right publishing house…and that’s all the prerequisite for getting published, and is no guarantee of success. What I really need now is the discipline to finish a novel I’m ready to query, so that’s the goal I’m working toward.
A house of my own.
Mister BS and I have a pretty good living arrangement, and I’m not complaining. While the responsibility of owning my own home terrifies me, I’d really love a 1000 square foot bungalow with a nice yard and a garden and big windows that let in lots of light to call my very own. While finding the perfect place is out of my control, I’m really going to focus on making the possibility of buying the house of my dreams a financial reality.
What did Mister BS wish for? He wouldn’t say.